lessons

Life lessons learned recently:

• it is best to turn the knob on a door before attempting to walk through it.
• the words “chairlift” and “forklift” are not interchangeable – especially when watching the Olympics.
• under no circumstances should you reveal the fact that you’re a farmer who’s never had a milkshake – people will remember this tidbit forever.
• do not start a conversation with a friend when their back is toward you – it may be embarrassing when this “friend” turns around and asks who you are.
• do not refer to ESPN as the news channel – you will seem less than intelligent.
• sneakers are not proper attire for a wedding, nor is an Adidas windbreaker – these items scream “Mennonite.”
• try not to call a “ceiling fan” a “chandelier” – people will think you are a hick.
• when attempting to remember the title of the national anthem, do not refer to it as “that song where everyone stands at attention with their hands over their heart” – you might seem less than patriotic.

There you have it folks – words of wisdom to live by…or not to live by as the case may be. =)